This post is by Tracy L., contributing author to Our Neighborhood Blog. Tracy is a wife and mother and writes a blog: Adoption Journey (bringinghomeboylaroy.blogspot.com) which tells the unfolding story her family’s path of adoption.
I haven’t blogged in awhile. I haven’t felt like it. I have been suffocating in self-pity for the past week.
Since we announced that we are adopting, I have been met with reactions I didn’t anticipate. I remember when I announced each of my pregnancies, it was received with excitement and encouragement. I thought that would be the case when we announced our adoption too. After all, we are being blessed with a son. That is exciting, right?
Since I didn’t expect it, it was rather difficult for me to digest. I got angry, I got depressed, I was hurt. I have spent the week just being sad. I spent the week doubting.
Things are not going as I thought they would.
Hmmm, did you read that last sentence? There in lies the problem.
Things are not supposed to go the way I think they should go. Things are supposed to go the way He has planned.
This morning, before my husband left for work, he told me about his quiet time. His words were so encouraging. I realized so many things this morning as he was talking to me. And since then God has shown me so much more.
My realizations not only came from my husband, but I have been listening to worship music this morning and every song has been an encouragement.
In Christ alone … He can move mountains … The more I seek You … Empty Me … I just want to wait on you, my God … Monster … (okay, that last one was more of how I was feeling before)
The Lord spoke to me through my husband and through worship music. My spirit is lifted. I know that we are doing His will and that is all that matters.
Yes, we may lose friends. Yes, our families may not understand or agree with us adopting.
But we are doing His will!
(you can follow me at www.faithfuljourneythroughstruggles.blogspot.com or www.bringinghomeboylaroy.blogspot.com)